Pride: True or False

Why are you prideful? Are you prideful? Am I just swinging a bat missing completely?

What if I said that some prideful people were just covering up their low self-esteem. Some of you may say it’s foolishness to say such a thing. Prideful people are proud of themselves, they are completely self-absorbed. Some of you may say I’m nuts but bear with me for a second. I am known to be a touch on the prideful side, okay, quite a bit on the prideful side.

Let’s take a ride into the past. Shall we? About a two years ago I was one of those people who thought they weren’t good enough. I would lay in bed at night thinking that I had come up short in various areas. To keep people thinking I was okay I put on a face to show people I thought highly of myself, sometimes too highly. While people thought I had it together, in my mind I thought I was a wreck.

I then went to Dibor, which is a leadership school that teaches you how to be an all out man or woman of God, a warrior for Christ. While in Dibor I was challenged to believe what the Word of God says I am. The word of God says I am victorious, I am a Prince, and I am an Heir to the Throne. How can I believe these things and still think that I am not good enough? God began changing my DNA and how I think about myself.

Now I error on the side of being to prideful in a real sense. The sense that I think I am better than everyone else. I think that my Scottish roots play a part in that. Now it is a daily thing for God to suppress me and to show himself through me. Isn’t it funny how that happens? We get out of one thing just to fall into another.

As people we put so much stock into what other people think of us that we often miss the real opinion we should care about, that is Jesus. I cared so much that other people would see me as strong that I would put up a false bravado. I now care very little about what people think about me in comparison of what God thinks about me.

How about you? Are you truly overly prideful? Or are you just setting up a false bravado?

Screen Generation.

Seven years ago Facebook changed the way we interact with one another. Six years ago YouTube began to transform the way we view the world. Eight years ago Google started a new way to find what you want to know. Four years ago the iPhone changed the way we use our cellphones.

Today in America we rely on technology.

Whether we are riding in our cars listening to Facebook updates in our new Chevy, or in our home watching some idiot hit himself on YouTube, or even sitting in the bathroom texting our best friend about plans for the day. We can’t live without it.

This is not a bad thing. from Franklin with electricity, to Edison with the lightbulb, or Bell with the telephone. Men all through history have constantly been finding things to improve or discover.

Why should we expect different from this generation?

Some religious people actually believe that the advancement of ourselves is a bad thing, for an extreme example, the Amish. They have actually cut themselves off from technology as a whole. They hold to the fact that the Bible states that. “We as Christians should be in the world but not of it.”

On the other side however there are men like Bill Gates the founder of Microsoft and Steve Jobs the CEO of Apple, that state that without these advancements we would never improve as a society.

There are however people in the middle like Lauren King a mother of three who says that there is such thing as being over reliant on technology. We need to control ourselves and our time. She thinks that it is bad when one of her kids doesn’t know how to read a map because the GPS in her car always tells them where to go.

I tend to side with Lauren. We need to watch how much we use technology. We need to step away from relying on technology and instead, use it as a tool of self betterment.

In our world today kids have killed themselves or other people over video games. We have become a society that is absorbed in technology and letting it rule us, instead of using it, as an aid to furthering ourselves. We must evaluate ourselves and see if we are addicted to the technology, or if we still have control over our usage. If we are addicted, we need to have enough strength to step back and take time off from such things as; Facebook, Google, YouTube, and even *gasp* the  iPhone.

When we decide that we have had enough, that we are not held down by this technology, maybe God can start showing us how to use it to better our society for Him. We are so self-absorbed by what we want and need, instead of what He wants, hence the names; FACEbook, MYspace, YOUtube, and iPhone. We can’t even bear the thought of actually being without these things even for a moment.

When will we start crying out for a change? Not be a generation of screen watchers but be a generation on fire for what is right and moral in God’s eyes. To not care so much about what your friends are saying on Facebook or the newest app on your iPhone. But care more about what the Word of God says and how it applies to your life.

It is time for this generation to shout a battle cry! For us to actually live up to the name of World Shakers.

When will we divert your attention from a computer screen to the real live person who is going to die without you telling them the truth about Jesus? When will we start using the  technology around us to further His truth and love?

Dreams?

What are dreams?

No I am not talking about the ones you’ve had since you were a kid. Where you dreamt to be superhuman or an astronaut. I’m also not here to talk about the dreams that you have when you grow up, to be a CEO in a major company, or a lawyer reciting the lines from A Few Good Men, “What do you want from me? I want the truth. YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!”

I’m not here to talk about nightmares either. When you wake up and you pee your bed ’cause you drank too much water and you were scared out of your wits.

I’m talking about dreams, normal, every night, or how ever often you dream, dreams. Notice I said night. No guys, not DAYdream when your boss is going on about something that has nothing to do with you. Just  normal dreams when you sleep, if you can possibly call them normal.

I dream every night.

I can’t remember the last time I didn’t. But what do those dreams mean? In the Bible many dreams had interpretations. Do ours? I dreamt that I was an officer in the military during the Civil War am I supposed to pull some kind of meaning out of that? I doubt it.

But I have dreams that I don’t understand why I had them, if there is no meaning. For example, the other night I dreamt that Danielle (the lovely friend I wrote about in my post entitled “Hope”) had hung out with me the day before she died. The only difference is that I knew she had died and that if I didn’t stop her from driving it would happen again. The entire dream I was frustrated. I would say “Danielle, how are you here?” she would reply “Daniel, I never left. What are you talking about?”. Anytime I would ask her not to drive she would laugh and say, “Don’t worry about me.”

I knew that line.

She told me that the day she died. I was getting more frustrated. At the same time I had no idea how she was here. I somehow knew that I was going to wake up soon. So I grabbed her and gave her a huge hug and a kiss on the cheek and held her for like 10 minutes. When I woke up I was sad that I couldn’t save her even though it was a dream. I was frustrated that I had such a vivid dream that I couldn’t control.

I immediately started looking for a meaning. It didn’t have to be profound or anything, just something to ease my conscience. My thought was that God would never give me a dream like that without some kind of meaning. That would be torturous and unlike Him, right?

I scoured my brain for reasons that could have triggered this dream. I did research on what dreams are, why we have them. Can we control them?

Fact #1: “A small percentage of people dream in black and white. It isn’t until they wake up that their brains put color to them.” This is a useless fact, but interesting.

Fact#2: “We cannot control our dreams, they are completely in our subconscious and therefore involuntary actions.” Useful, at least I know I am not torturing myself.

Fact#3: “Recalling dreams is actually very unusual. Only a small percentage of people can remember that they did in fact, dream.” Useful, I state again, “I don’t remember the last time I didn’t dream.”, sound familiar? (Look to the top of this post, you’ll find it.)

If recalling dreams isn’t usual, yet I always remember mine, does that mean something?Am I a prophetic dreamer?

I doubt it. I have never had one of my dreams mean anything of value or defined. But this dream really bugs me. Why do we dream about things that make us sad or angry? Who gives us dreams? Is it God or the devil? I have come to the conclusion that God knows and that is good enough for me. When, or if, He lets me in on the meaning behind them, I will listen intently. But if that never happens then oh well, it’s not like I can stop dreaming.

Anybody got any ideas? What is the reason for dreaming? Who does give us dreams? Anyone want to become a dream interpreter and from here on out tell me what mine mean? What are some of your dreams that that you dislike or like?

It’s Your Life!

Are you the owner of your life? Do you have the right to do what you want? I discussed this with a coworker the other day. (For now let’s call him Tim.) We discussed the topic of a sports figure leaving his team to go to another. The sports figure had no reason, the team was likable and was on its way to a championship (for all you sports fans this was a rhetorical situation, I am not referring to Lebron James or anyone specific).

Tim defended that this figure had given his time and energy and had no further obligation so what he did was his choice. Trying my best no to interfere I let him continue.  Tim said, in his southern accent,  ”Whatever is best for you, you do it!.”

I then interrupted him saying “In everything or sports?” wanting to clear up the sudden outburst my co-worker had just declared. I hoped he would say just sports but he replied “In EVERYTHING!”, even slowing the word down for me to understand.

This took me back for a second but I was quick to respond, “What about divorce? If you decide you don’t like your wife you divorce her? Abortion? You don’t have time for a baby so you abort it? How about stealing? You need food, but you have no job cause you’re a bum so you steal? Are these all okay since it’s best for me?”

Tim didn’t miss a beat, he once again said “In EVERYTHING” holding steadfast to his belief.

I can’t agree less with the man. But I also cannot help but admire his faithfulness to his belief. Tim is an atheist. Here is a man who cares as little about Christianity than the next game coming on, willing to defend what he says, no matter what. Much more so as a Christian, shouldn’t I be able to defend my beliefs without fear?

Me and Tim went onto other sports related topics but that idea won’t leave me. Will I continue to stand up for me ideas or beliefs?

Will you?

Hope

“When was the last time you felt at the end of your rope? I haven’t blogged in a while. This isn’t because I forgot or anything, it’s because I didn’t want to blog. I felt that my words weren’t worth anything. I was going through a time where I felt that I wasn’t making an impact on anyone’s life. I started drawing further into myself. I secluded my soul and felt demoralized. I had little if any motivation.

During the summer I made my schedule as busy as I could so that I didn’t have to face myself. I upped my work hours by 100% and tried to make plans to be out with friends almost every day.

I tried reading my bible but got nothing out of it.

I tried worshiping but found I had no will to sing.

When youth group started up in September Pastor Christopher spoke a message entitled Praying Like Lions. He spoke about how we pray like pansies. We don’t chase after or stalk our prey, instead we are lazy and half-hearted. He spoke how sometimes all we need to do is pray harder to get that last push.

After hearing that message I decided it was time to pray. Some may think that to pray is elementary and I agree. I should have thought to pray way before anything else. I cried out to God and although I don’t think that yelling is the only way to pray (God himself spoke to Elijah in a still small voice in a soft wind), it worked for me. God started to change my thoughts. In that moment he gave me a heart for what was right and a heart for people who I couldn’t ignore.

During the weeks following that message there were plenty of hardships. As I pressed into God the enemy pressed into making me stumble.

At first he tried lust, which I must admit worked plenty of times in the past; this time however it failed. He even tried drinking and drugs which to me is easy to decline.

In the beginning of September I started talking to an amazing young woman. She quickly became my best friend, and we talked all the time. I had told her everything I was going through and she constantly encouraged me to dive deeper into God.

Our friendship was just that; a friendship. There was no want for anything deeper on either side. We shared a lot in common, including much of our personalities.”

Sadly, our friendship was cut short when Danielle Westlake passed away in a car accident on 11-18-2010.

I don’t the devil any credit for taking Danielle away he didn’t have the power to do that. I also don’t blame God for it, he is far to loving for that. The only thing I can blame is our sinful nature. We brought sin into a perfect world, that caused imperfection. That is why bad things happen to great people.

But that is a different subject altogether.

The enemy took this opportunity to push me into depression. He started saying that I should have saved her, that I could have been in the car and helped her if I cared more. The worst part is that I believed him. I started on a downhill slide I couldn’t get off. I started blaming myself for not being with her, for not making sure she didn’t drive.

Months have gone by since that beautiful friend left us. But I think of her everyday.

It wasn’t until last week I decided to take an hour and give it to God in worship. I had a 2 hour break between classes, so why not?

I went into my awesome church sanctuary and blared the worship music to the point that I couldn’t hear my own voice. Jason Upton was on shuffle and on came the song Fly. (For those of you who have never heard the story behind Fly I encourage you to watch this video.) Angels actually sing with Upton in the recording, and as I began singing and heard the enemy say “Shut-up! You betrayed your friend! How dare you try to sing with angels!

I cried uncontrollably believing the lie that I had failed my best friend. Then I heard Upton singing “You have been set free/You have been set free/Nothing, nothing, nothing/No weapon could ever hold you/Fly.”

I have never heard God say anything so clearly, and I still don’t know if it was just my spirit man or God himself, but I heard, “I love you Daniel, Let Danielle be with me, I’ll keep her safe until you get here, It wasn’t your fault.”

When the God of the universe tells you it isn’t your fault, I think he knows.

Now I wasn’t weeping because the tormented me with sadness, but I was weeping because I was free!

Since then I have had new chances to know who God really is, and a new prospective on his heart. I don’t claim to be perfect; that would be foolish. Instead I find perfection in the One who is perfect: Jesus Christ. He has given me hope in the darkness, strength in my weakness, comfort when I’m weary, and shelter in the storm.

The desert is never a fun place to be, but when you’re finally out of it you’re indeed made strong through God.

I once had it prophesied over me that “You are like the stone in David’s sling, David only needed one stone to take down Goliath. Just like David, God only needs one stone to take down giants. Daniel you are God’s one stone. With you he will take out giants.” I didn’t believe that when it was first said but I believe it now. God can do anything through me.

I don’t know where I heard this quote or if I made it up, but I love it all the same.

“When one is stripped of all else and must search himself, how many excuses will he come up with before he sifts through the darkness inside him?”

I plead with you do not wait to sift through your darkness. God is ready to take you through it, just reach out and grab His hand. Get through it now rather than later.